The hammer approach!

April 26 The hammer approach

Famous psychologist Abraham Maslow said, ‘If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail.’

What he means is that some of us have strong personalities and always take the hammer approach when something gentler will do.

If that’s your problem, try using the following T’s:

1) Total picture.

A man walked into a bar, ‘Do you have anything to cure hiccups?’ he asked. The bartender slapped him across the face. ‘Hey! What’s that for?’ said the man. The bartender smiled ‘Well, you don’t have hiccups any more, do you?’ ‘I never did’ the man replied. ‘I wanted something to cure my wife; she’s outside in the car.’

Do you come to conclusions before you actually have a proper grasp of the issue?

Chill out for a minute and think; then you’ll be more likely to get the total picture.

2) Timing.

If the parent doesn’t get the injured child to the hospital quickly enough, her life might be lost; and if you don’t apologize when you’ve wronged someone, the relationship could be lost. When you act, is as important as taking the right action. So is knowing when not to act.

Lady Dorothy Nevill observed:

‘The art of conversation is not only to say the right thing in the right place, but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.’

3) Temperature.

As tempers flare, we drop more bombs instead of calling a ceasefire.

Here’s a tip:

a) if the reaction is worse than the action, the problem usually increases

b) if the reaction is less than the action, the problem usually decreases.

So, don’t take the hammer approach!

‘It is best to listen much, speak little, and not become angry.’ James 1:19 TLB

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