Practise Being Unselfish (5)
Here are three questions people often ask themselves when you’re talking to them:
1) Do you really care about me? Dr. Calvin Miller put it like this: ‘When people listen to others speak, sometimes they’re silently thinking, “I am loneliness waiting for a friend. I am weeping in want of laughter. I am a sigh in search of consolation. I am a wound in search of healing. If you want to unlock my attention, you have but to convince me you want to be my friend.’’’
2) Can you really help me? Successful people bear in mind that others are continually asking themselves that question. And one way you can answer it is by focusing on the benefits you have to offer. Let’s face it, people are bombarded every day with the information on the features of this product and that gadget. So eventually they tune out.
3) Can I really trust you? William Arthur Ward wrote, ‘Blessed is he who has learned to admire but not envy, to follow but not imitate, to praise but not flatter, and to lead but not manipulate.’ Your charisma and ability may get you to the top, but only your character and commitment will keep you there.
Trust is built on telling the truth and following through on your commitments. People take action for their own reasons, not yours. And what we learn about them always results in a greater reward than what we tell them about ourselves. Whether they’re buying a car, choosing a mate, or listening to a sermon, deep down they want to know, ‘Can I trust this person?’ Well…can they?
‘…I am not seeking my own good but the good of many…’ 1 Corinthians 10:33 NIV