On Marriage (5)
Ask the elders: they were quick to discover that the greatest threat to marriage is—selfishness!
A mother was trying to explain to her little son the benefits of unselfishness. She concluded her talk by saying, ‘We’re in this world to help others.’ After due consideration the boy asked, ‘Well then, what are others here for?’
Thinking of tying the knot?
When two people put their own individual needs and wants first, they’re on a collision course.
Let’s look at some examples of selfishness in marriage:
a) In-laws. It’s a sign of selfishness and immaturity when you constantly harp about what your parents said, and how they did things. It’s unfair to your spouse and it’ll hurt your relationship.
b) Pornography. The Psalmist wrote, ‘I refuse…to look at corrupting people and degrading things’ (Psalms 101:3 TM). Pornography is as addictive as heroin and untold numbers of marriages are shipwrecked by it. Not only does it leave you feeling ashamed, it can devastate your partner’s self-worth.
c) Disagreements. Don’t be like the woman who told her friend, ‘We’ve been married for twenty years and never quarrelled once. If a difference of opinion arises and I’m right, my husband gives in.’ Her friend asked, ‘And what if he’s right?’ Without hesitating she replied, ‘That has never happened!’
d) Prayerlessness. Ninety per cent of Christian couples don’t read the Bible and pray together. If Christ is the most important thing in your lives, He should be the thing you most enjoy sharing. When passion and physical beauty fade, your shared love for Christ will sustain you through the storms of life. Bear these things in mind in your future relationship.
‘Many waters cannot quench love.’ Song of Solomon 8:7 NIV